October 04, 2002

Mac Attack!Ack!Ack!Ack!

image copyright Fred First

Old MacDonald had a coronary

I'm sorry. I was at an absolute loss for words and unable to describe to you what I had seen a few days ago in the local Target store. So I felt obliged to take the camera back yesterday and record this grotesque image. I remain speechless. But with the dry heaves.

You know, there is a discussion going on over at Redwood Dragon about the effect of children's toys on attitudes toward war. Frankly, I would trust that my little ones, mentally disfigured by play in Barbie's bombed-out doll house, would not be able, then, to act on their distorted little mentation and go out and purchase vast quantities of shoulder-held grenade launchers.

But, after hours of playing with their MacDonalds Food Set Backpack with Toy Food ($7.99 plus local sales tax, and do wipe your greazy fingers before paying)...our wee ones, with collusion of corpulent and indulgent financiers, can readily acquire McD's WMD. And the mass will be their own.

Now this playtoy scares me.

This product has been approved by the Fried Foods and Drug Adminstration as an appetite stimulant and behavioral modifier for emaciated American children whose weight is equal to or less than 30 pounds (13 Kg) per 12" of height or blood total cholesterol is equal to or less than 325 mg/dl.

Considerable corpulence may occur which may necessitate purchasing additional airline tickets. In addition, as the result of exposure to this and similar products, type II diabetes, premature heart problems, joint disorders, breathing difficulty, high blood pressure and stroke may occur.

Posted by fred1st at October 4, 2002 04:39 AM

I should think you'd be able to sue McDonalds for pain and suffering now, don't you?

Posted by: bigwig at October 4, 2002 07:57 AM

It should come with a free or discounted toy doctor's kit.

Posted by: Lisa at October 4, 2002 08:51 AM

Thank goodness it's a toy! When I first saw the pic I was worried that McD's was selling its stuff in a grocery store. Letting kids eat the toy would be safer, I think. Perhaps one might keep a few on hand for TV-induced emergencies?

Posted by: Huw at October 4, 2002 09:01 AM

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